Tagged With: Funny
Context: discussing Washington and Colorado’s recent legalization of marijuana. Prof. B.: In Colorado they sold a million dollars’ worth on the first day. Student: Think of the tax revenues of that. They’re going to have some great highways. Smartarse Student: …no pun intended.
If you’ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin’ dog…. From the public record, we found one even better. If you’ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a cowboy hat (see page 3), you might be a redneck. (Note: this document is in the public record, and all of the public filings of the … Continue reading
The Hill is reporting that two Representatives (Donna Edwards, D-MD, and Eddie Bernice Johnson, D-TX) are proposing the establishment of a National Park on the moon. Yes, the moon. Clearly, they’re unfamiliar with the Outer Space Treaty, which forbids a government from claiming any land upon the moon (undoubtedly, this is why they’re Representatives, not … Continue reading
In discussing a case… Prof. B.: Good explanation. Did the dissent agree with the majority? Smartarse Student: No…pretty much by definition of dissent. Prof. B.: <performs migraine salute while class laughs> Okay, that’s fair, you got me. Two minutes later, Prof. B. is grilling smartarse student Smartarse Student: This is you getting even with me, … Continue reading
Sitting in the last session of our Commercial Paper class today, there came a rapping at the chamber door. Prof. H. opened the door to find a pizza delivery man bearing goods. Surprised, and a bit amused, Prof. H. asks the class who ordered it. Much excited whispering and laughing, but nobody admits to it. … Continue reading
Prof. M: “…the technical term is they get screwed on the backend. That’s on, not in, Mr. <smartarse student>.” <class erupts in laughter> Later: Prof. M: “What happens when shareholder value is locked up in an incestuous relationship between incompetent management and an incompetent board?” Smartarse student: “Dell.”
$ man suedo SYNOPSIS Obtain privileges by using a court INVOCATION Unfortunately by telling you how to invoke this command we would open ourselves as target. Please contact your lawyer for more information. SEE ALSO court(8), lawyer(8) http://news.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=3607225&cid=43342405
“Synergies: firing people!” –Prof. M
Dave: I bought Joey a little plush elk when I was in Wyoming just before he was born. He’s playing with it, and I had to explain the difference between “ears” and “antlers.” He had lots of fun pointing to each and saying “ears and antlers, ears and antlers.” …which then inexplicably morphed into “Aunt … Continue reading
We were looking through the freezer and happened to see a bottle of ketchup. Sez we: “what’s that doing in there?” Seems rather an odd place to keep ketchup. Then it hit us: it’s right next to the tater tots! Yes, the five-year-old has been in the kitchen, and his thought process is apparently contagious.