Congratulations on the purchase of your new cursed Instant Pot multi-use programmable Pressure Cooker. Instant Pot is the #1 selling 7-in-1 multi-cooker that reduces cooking times up to 70% by summoning the horrible black magical powers of Baphomet, the Sabbatic Goat God. Your cursed Instant Pot will change the way you cook kitchen staples like soups, stews, meats, rice, potatoes, hard boiled eggs and so much more!
Before you get started here are some Frequently Asked Questions.
What is the Instant Pot?
The Instant Pot is a smart Electric Pressure Cooker that lets you spend less time in the kitchen and more time with your family.
It functions as a pressure cooker, slow cooker, rice cooker, yogurt maker, sauté/searing pan, steamer and warming pot all in one convenient appliance!
How does my cursed Instant Pot cook food so quickly?
The cursed Instant Pot uses a high-pressure cooking chamber, advanced microprocessor technology and the black magic of an ancient pagan deity, Baphomet, our unholy dark lord and savior, to reduce cooking times and energy usage by up to 70%.
Developed by top food scientists, engineers, and necromancers, the Instant Pot uses cutting-edge, lab-tested algorithms to control cooking pressure and temperature while keeping the revolting powers of an atavistic goat-god safely trapped within a shard of shimmering jet black obsidian.
Read the whole thing at https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/faq-your-new-cursed-instant-pot
Tags: Cooking, Food, Funny
Homemade fajitas for dinner tonight (well, we bought the tortillas, but everything else was homemade). One each: large white onion, green, yellow, orange, and red bell peppers. Cook gently–just barely enough to soften, not so much as to lose the bright flavour of the peppers. We used chicken thighs for the meat; nicely juicy and flavorful. Regrettably, it’s too cold to grill (we took our day’s walk before the sun set), so we settled for sautéeing with a bit of olive oil. Not as good as grilled, but certainly passable. A bit of sour cream, a handful of crumbled cotija cheese, and a hearty squeeze of lime, again for the brightness (to match the color) that we so love to share!
Tags: Cooking, Food
No, not weather, and no, not spices. TV seasons (“series” to our English friends).
We have come to the conclusion that we are not a fan of the current trend of breaking up a season into “half-seasons,” with a “mid-season finale” and “mid-season premiere” in early December and mid-January, respectively. No sooner do you get into the new season then it takes a hiatus for a month or more; watching tonight’s MacGyver*, it looks like it’s getting a third break, to return in March.
We are similarly not impressed with the strange timing of Penn & Teller: Fool Us, running from July through October, and only having about a dozen episodes per season. That precedent appears to have been set in its first two seasons on ITV over across the pond; we suppose they do things differently over there, and the four-year separation between series 1 and series 2 would have been far more aggravating than the breaks about which we previously complained, so we should probably just smile and be patient.
Still, more magic would be nice; we’d even settle for Masters of Illusion–not even close to a substitute for the Great Ones, but any port in a storm–but it seems to have adopted the same schedule as P&T. Boo.
* Do not get us started. We like the real MacGyver, and have the whole series on DVD. About the only thing the new show retains is the name, and the changes are not for the better.
We revisited a favourite recipe for dinner tonight: shrimp courtbouillon. One nice thing about that recipe (to be posted later) is that it lends itself to any meat, not just shrimp; we added chicken today, but have also made it with andouille sausage, fish (red snapper is a fine choice), various combinations…the sky’s the limit. It also goes a long way when served over rice. “A piece of French bread with which to wipe my bowl/good for the body, good for the soul,” and some Pete Fountain on Pandora…a nice meal indeed.
No Bourbon chicken this time around, though.
Tags: Cooking, Food, Music
We would like to tender our apologies for our recent downtime. A month ago, our web hosting moved to a new server; we got that transferred, but discovered a few days ago that while we transferred the web content, we failed to transfer the database (which drives the content); consequently, when the hosting arrangement for the database expired, we were down again. Moreover, the posts made since the last backup (a month ago) were not preserved.
We shall try to resurrect those posts to the best of our ability; we know it’s frustrating when a post you like disappears.
In good news, we think this will resolve the last of our technology issues for the foreseeable future.
Even better than a favourite sweater….
Tags: Fire, Life, Weather